Server Issues

Apologies to all who have had difficulty reaching the site.  Our servers are struggling to cope with heavy traffic.  We’ve brought in some highly rated (and unbelievably expensive) management consultants and will be implementing their suggestions.  This means cutting intern pay, laying off career employees, dropping the pension program and paying a second and larger bonus to senior management.  We are seeking additional bailout money from the federal government as well.  While it is true that we have tried this in the past and it hasn’t solved the problem per se, this time we are sure it will work because we paid our consultants so lavishly that no matter what happens it isn’t our fault.